Book Review: Sorry Twilight Fans

I have noticed for months that many of the students in my school have been reading the Twilight saga by Stephanie Meyer. I haven’t had much time to read anything except for scholastic reading, so I was glad to have the opportunity to indulge in reading a mind-numbing book for a change.

In my opinion, Twilight was just that. It was mind-numbing, pleasure reading. My life was not changed, I did not develop a “thing” for undead, vampire-esqe, noble savage archetypes. I did not fall in love with Edward Cullen. I think I may be the only rational female who read Twilight and kept her sanity.

I was actually quite proud of the fact that up until this weekend, I had not succumbed to the fad of being a Twilightaholic. I prided myself on not having been defiled by the “cool” thing to do. I was bragging about being an avid Fanny Fern, Jane Austen, William Faulkner fan. After all, I know what real literature is like. I did, in fact, major in English.
Alas, all my swelling pride came to a disturbing halt. Solomon did say that “pride goeth before the fall,” so I should have known that the climax of my pride was about to be proceeded by my reluctant caving.

As far as good, steady literature is concerned, Twilight does not compare to the classics of the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries have produced. Dracula, it is not. Dracula, Meyer did obviously reference in her study of vampires. She does know her myth’s myth from fact. On the other hand, I did find it to be too contrived and too created for mass consumption. As I read, I was able to predict every twist and turn in the plot. I could see everything coming before it actually happened. In some cases, my assumptions would have been better than what actually happened. Meyer is obviously writing to an audience of hormonal, frustrated, jaded young girls. The main character Bella Swan, is sarcastic, introverted, and to some degree, tortured. She somehow has this aloof awareness that could only be pulled off by someone penned in a novel. She is exactly what the “in” crowd would consider hopeless in real life, but exactly what the “in” crowd would love to be, given the chance. She is the Sandra Dee for the darkened girl of the 21st century. I can see girls even now imitating Bella Swan and pretending to be her.

Edward Cullen, the devastatingly attractive, old-but-young vampire can be clinically diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder with just a casual reading of the book. His hatred for who he is causes him to push Bella away, yet pull her in when he feels like doing so. He manipulates her, yet she does not see this. I don’t think anyone else reading the book has yet to pick up on this twisted, demented relationship. He is charming, attractive, smooth-talking, rebellious, and when convenient, repentant for his instinctual actions. He is the suave, potentially abusive boyfriend for Bella’s sick need to be abused. Bella is the pretty, falsely innocent girl that has that weird co-dependence on someone who could ultimately abuse her. Her acerbic attitude attempts to mask this and pass her off as being a voluntary outcast who is deep-down, just too cool for school.

With all my psychoanalysis aside, I did enjoy reading the book. It was okay. I might say that reading it was a guilty pleasure. Of course, how could anyone with more than a twelve year old mindset become so deeply involved with these fictional characters that they blur the lines between fiction and reality? Oh, wait. Never mind. I forgot about the whole nation.

If anything extremely positive came from me reading this book besides the fact that I just enjoyed reading a mediocre book, I have discovered a formula for writing a novel and cashing in on teenage angst. I think Stephanie Meyer has done just that. I don’t think she expects anyone to consider her the next Mary Shelley or even the next Ann Rice (God, help us). I don’t even think she really expected anyone to take her all that seriously as a writer. I think she saw a cash cow and decided to milk that sucker for all it’s worth. And for that, I have to say well done Ms. Meyer. Well done.